I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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