yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
