Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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