I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize