Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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