It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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