I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Randomize
