how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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