I could make wine with my vomit
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
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