doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
