I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
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While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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