My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize