We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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