So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Randomize
