what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Randomize
