OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
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