she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Help. Why am I so naked?
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize