Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Randomize
