Who did Billy Mays play for?
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
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