If i come over, it means nothing
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
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