Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
