I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Life is so much better after having sex.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Randomize
