the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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