All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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