I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
tell me about the eggs
Come on in and take your pants off
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