OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize