Texts From Last Night

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  (516): View more from New York

  Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.

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  (516): Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door. http://tfl.nu/5od7
  Replies (11) Good night (4481) Bad night (643)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.

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  (908): Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life. http://tfl.nu/04rm
  Replies (63) Good night (1187) Bad night (5321)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.

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  (920): Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep. http://tfl.nu/o54g
  Replies (36) Good night (12929) Bad night (1305)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.

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  (781): his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me. http://tfl.nu/jba1
  Replies (5) Good night (2301) Bad night (931)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.

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  (303): I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume. http://tfl.nu/tvs1
  Replies (7) Good night (2665) Bad night (970)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.

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  (910): Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook. http://tfl.nu/qwbp
  Replies (11) Good night (1344) Bad night (893)
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"

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  (778): I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie" http://tfl.nu/vq1n
  Replies (17) Good night (2066) Bad night (1463)
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  (716): View more from New York

  it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.

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  (716): it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend. http://tfl.nu/9nvz
  Replies (2) Good night (1417) Bad night (779)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.

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  (+44): I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness. http://tfl.nu/lp3m
  Replies (5) Good night (1393) Bad night (588)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.

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  (603): Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes. http://tfl.nu/6vyp
  Replies (4) Good night (415) Bad night (818)
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  (530): View more from California

  We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.

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  (530): We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame. http://tfl.nu/it3w
  Replies (8) Good night (1902) Bad night (547)
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  (760): View more from California

  He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.

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  (760): He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes. http://tfl.nu/l52c
  Replies (4) Good night (1484) Bad night (542)
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  (585): View more from New York

  Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?

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  (585): Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain? http://tfl.nu/ljpg
  Replies (0) Good night (675) Bad night (500)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?

  (1-248): View more from Michigan

  I don't know what to say

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  (248): Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud? (1-248): I don't know what to say http://tfl.nu/pf22
  Replies (1) Good night (527) Bad night (448)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic

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  (540): that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic http://tfl.nu/gwhk
  Replies (2) Good night (688) Bad night (358)

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