Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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