she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
