i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
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we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
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This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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