she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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