is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
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