I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Randomize
