if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
