My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
These 19 People Had Awkward Celebrity Sex Dreams
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
These 27 People Had No Idea What They Were Doing When It Came To Sex
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making