yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.