Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
You are a genius and a whore.
Randomize
