i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
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