i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
