Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
