Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Randomize
