I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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