I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Randomize
