I bet he comes in French.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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