did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
My pussy is not your playground.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
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Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
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If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
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