Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Randomize
