You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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