just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
