I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
you made out with another girl for some wings
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
