i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
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