SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Two words: nipple clamps
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